The World I Want


Very recently I quit my job. Yesterday when somebody asked me what I was going to do next, my reply was “I want to get away!” “What from?” he asked. “Everything,” I said. Of course that answer isn’t sufficient when somebody is genuinely looking for a way to help you. I knew that. Although, I’m very sure that my inability to explain myself, made me look like an idiot. I couldn’t help it. I have always felt distressed when a conversation gets private and personal about me.

My sad attempt at making my thoughts clear to this person prompted me to write about it. I have always been clearer on paper (or e-paper for that matter).

I don’t want to live a life that the world expects us to live. I’ve tried, but realized that my priorities are very different. Work, for me, is not my life. It is a part of life, but nobody sees it like that anymore. If you’re not killing yourself over your job while hating it, you’re going nowhere professionally.

I’m tired of all the selfishness and the greed that constitutes the world. People function on the default setting of being mean to each other. Today, even a smile is not always reciprocated. How have we come to be consumed with so much indifference? Why is everyone a lying, hypocrite? Why are we so quick to pass judgement and hate each other? Why are we proud of the things that we should be ashamed of? Why have we become so jaded that apathetic behaviour seems normal to us? Why do we have to put “Learn to say ‘Thank You’” on a list of things to do? Where did we lose all the goodness in us?

So, when I say that I want to run away from everything, this above, is what I mean by ‘everything’.

I want to build healthy relationships with people who can help me grow as a person and vice versa. I want to be a part of a simple society wherein people truly care about each other, without any ulterior motives. I want my life to not be driven by money and popularity and public image, but measure it by the lives I have touched. I don’t want a list of random acts of kindness to do once a week or over a month, I want my everyday life to be a series of acts of kindness. I want as much truth in what I get, as in what I give. I want to live a valuable life. In the end, I want to be able to look back at my life and be proud of myself. And make my Creator proud.

Maybe I might find this. Maybe I wont. But I will keep searching. And I am.   


My Newfound Ariel Castro Fear

Throughout history, women have learnt to strive for independence and break the bondages of the being treated as a second class citizen by the dominating gender of the dominating species. But all the movements and the radical changes in the society and its thinking has done nothing to upgrade the mentality of the sexual deviants. If anything, it has encouraged them even more. According to a study, 1 out of 8 women admitted to being raped in their lifetime, in 1992. Now, according to a recent study, 1 out of every 5 women is raped every year. Which means if you know 20 women, there will be atleast 4 of them who have either been raped or have been a victim of attempted rape. What’s more scary is that, if they haven’t, then, statistically, they will be. So now, when I go out, I worry not only about getting mugged, being stabbed, getting run over by a truck or a bus, being held hostage by a terrorist group at the mall, being buried alive under the debris of a fallen building, dying, but also about being eve-teased, being misbehaved with, raped, kidnapped and raped and sold for sex trafficking, kidnapped and raped and killed, kidnapped and raped and held captive for 10 years while chained to a wall.

Yes, women can vote now and we are equal wage earners as any man doing the same work as us. But what have we really accomplished as a moral society? As I see it, not all women are working because they choose not to, they can, but they don’t; not all women vote, they can but they are just so lazy (guilty as charged), but ALL women want to feel safe, unfortunately we can’t. So, our accomplishments from my point of view, Dear Society, have been few. If given a choice, I would rather not feel threatened every time I have to walk to the nearest supermarket, than be allowed to inherit my father’s property. Although, I am not complaining about the latter (= .